mayamaia ([personal profile] mayamaia) wrote2008-10-28 06:45 pm

Nothing worth doing - that hasn't been done already - is ever easy

For once, in a moment of self-assurance and self-respect, I thought of a big change to make in myself. I wasn't depressed or afraid when I thought of it (though I am afraid now, as one often is about change), so it fills my criteria for decisions to trust.

It boils down to this: I don't have to get over Jeff to return to a healthy outlook - I need to get over the breakup itself, and what caused it. ALL of what caused it. Which means I need to come clean about a few things, and then I need to develop a strong friendship with a guy I truly admire who is NOT Jeff, leaving the option open for anything else.

So. I'm thinking about that instead of my midterm which is due tomorrow morning. I am very scared, so I'll just clinch it by this: I WILL tell the tale, as soon as I can, as truthfully and objectively as I can. And tonight I will finish my homework instead of fretting any more about something that is a certainty.

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