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Uff da
"Sometimes you make him out to be a jerk and sometimes a saint. That says to me that he's a jerk. And you're too smart to still be in love with a jerk." "You're right. I am. Clearly I haven't described him well enough." How's that for a sarcastic, obvious and quick answer. Shame on me.
But I've told myself if I'm going to speak about him, I'd better be honest, tell every story, not just one side or the other. That makes for a lot of stories of extremes.
I suppose it comes down to this: If he actually is a jerk, I'd still rather be in love with a jerk than not be in love and be a jerk myself.
I hate the way I think and want to act when I'm going out with most men. I grow steadily more careless and cruel. I feel as if I slowly grow fangs and an appetite for whatever passes as their former happiness. I don't like feeling myself becoming a monster.
So let me be in love with someone who is as careless as he is kind and truly be in love. We all are monsters, we all are jerks, we all are human - and that he is too is no terror, but delight.
But I've told myself if I'm going to speak about him, I'd better be honest, tell every story, not just one side or the other. That makes for a lot of stories of extremes.
I suppose it comes down to this: If he actually is a jerk, I'd still rather be in love with a jerk than not be in love and be a jerk myself.
I hate the way I think and want to act when I'm going out with most men. I grow steadily more careless and cruel. I feel as if I slowly grow fangs and an appetite for whatever passes as their former happiness. I don't like feeling myself becoming a monster.
So let me be in love with someone who is as careless as he is kind and truly be in love. We all are monsters, we all are jerks, we all are human - and that he is too is no terror, but delight.