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Poem

Apr. 2nd, 2008 08:01 pm
words )

Poem: Play

Feb. 14th, 2008 11:45 pm
How could I refuse?
What I love best of you
Is how you always make me change my mind

I laugh and turn about
And what I said "I won't"
I will, if only because it's for you

That grin, that impish grin!
You know you caught me fast
I love the way you play upon my thoughts

A game, a cunning toy
A thing you quickly do
But still you do enjoy it every time

Oh how I love the way
You make me change my mind
But it was only set for you to change
mayamaia: (Aia)
"Have you met Miss Smith? She's my best friend."

Hrm.
****************
You know what it's like?

There is one thing I know that is unchanging.
It's a feeling of beauty and love that permeates the world
And when I am at peace and calm I can feel it.

There is one thing I know that is unchanging
And I feared once that you were changing it
But it changed me.

There is one thing I know that is unchanging
Something that seems to be a part of everything
And I was once shocked that you were part of it.

When I am at peace and calm I can feel it.
But when I am with you I can feel it
Without the peace or calm.

There is one thing I know
And when I look at it I am unchanging
And when I look at you I am
Everything I know about you
Exists in a wave pattern
Complicated and full of peaks and troughs and
Somewhere out there in the ones and zeroes
I think that I know who you are except I don't
know how to read the ones and zeroes and ones and
what do you mean?

Some things are easier to read
Closer to the surface
Retranslated into semi-legible codes
of peaks and troughs and strange patterns
and the software says This is This and that is that
And I think I should be able to know why

But things you've done and things you don't
So strange I think I love and know you anyway
And I'm relieved
You hurt me again
You spit in my thoughts and threw my porcelain pig out the window
And you are such a fucking idiot
But at least I still love you so I know that I'm the same
At least I am the same

But are you any different
Weren't you a little bitch back then
But at least I loved you then, no, now, no wait
I loved you then
Does that make me less because I did?
I should have better taste, right?
No, you're perfect, you're ideal
You are flawed in all the ways I understand
And you may not always be good or kind but God help me
At least you make sense
Nobody makes sense
The world is insane and I can't keep track
But at least you makes sense and I'll take your hand

And the path straightens out before me.
It's hard to tell what is left. Old ambitions tossed aside like leaves in one's hair. New ones, yes, but different.

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mayamaia: (Exercise)
I'm sorry, I can't just leave it to fade away.

How much do you remember?
How much have you lost in
quintessence of words
used to describe what could not be expressed?

Essence of feeling
distilled into words
pure and perfect and cold.

Yes, you remember where he touched you and how
What he kissed in what way
But when you remember how it felt
Do you remember it true
or just ...what you could describe?

God knows why you want to cry in his arms.
It's been just so long
And it was just the once
or the twice
or forever
Or all in your mind

What can you remember?
When it still catches your breath
is that a concoction
of your very own mind?
Was he really that good?
Was he really that far away?
Why is it you only remember dead flesh?

This time, we rose up like eagles, like doves.
That time, we passed one another in the night.
This time, we were greater than heroes of song.
That time, we never touched once with our eyes.

Something is waiting there
in the things that I know
Saying "you would have done it again, my darling"
But still these things that are certain
Fade slowly away
Distilled and expressed
And turned into cold clay
One feeling to throw the rest away

Exalting me to the heights
Where the stars prick out from a sunlit sky
Where the glittering lights blind and enrapture

So lost without it

Memory of the airless climes
Thick in the haze and smoke of the ground
Sun safe and faint and sifted through blue

Unhinged desire to return to the lost

Climbing the world to reach my living star
But my senses are dulled, what was up is flat
What was down is weight and fatigue.
I don't want to be worshipped.
I want to be matched.

I don't want to be a marvel.
I want to be understood.

When I kiss a man, I don't want him to grow weak at the knees.
I want my kiss to give him strength, and help him know where he stands.

And I don't want the man to lose himself in my arms
but find all the best of himself there.

Perhaps, if love be true, I must become a Goddess in his eyes.
But let him find his own spark of divinity
Through my touch
Through my voice
Through my eyes
Through the love that mirrors mine.

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